Maximilian

Creator


Terminal Lance #385 “Barracks Privacy Policy”

June 23, 2015

Relationships get weird in the Marine Corps.

It should be common sense, but you should really never bring a woman to the barracks. There’s no real reason to anyway, and usually it just makes her super uncomfortable to be gawked at and hit on by 150 sex-starved 18-24 year old males.

I mean, it’s possible she’s into that sort of thing. Then again, I always like to say, if she even knows what a barracks or a Lance Corporal¬†is, she’s probably not the kind of girl you want to take back anyway. (Obvious exception being a female Marine, but you know what I mean) This particular rule of thumb is why it can be difficult to enjoy being single aboard a military installation, as all of the surrounding towns and areas are usually teeming with these sorts of people. The Jacksonvilles, Oceansides and San Clementes are generally places to avoid if you’re looking for any kind of meaningful connection with a woman.

If you’re in Hawaii, try going all the way out to Honolulu on the weekend. If you’re in Camp Pendleton, take a road trip up to Los Angeles, where 90% of the women are way out of your league but might make an exception if you pull the Marine card. If you’re in Camp Lejeune, try just giving up and crying into a can of Cope Longcut, because you’re kind of fucked.

If you’re in Okinawa, I don’t know. Go eat some yakisoba or something.

On a personal note, it feels good to be back into the swing of things. I mentioned before that I took a very brief trip (like 48 hours brief) to LA for some top secret awesome stuff, but I’m back at my desk and going full speed with finishing The White Donkey. I’ve shown it to a few people now and all of the feedback I’ve gotten has been immensely positive, so I’m excited to finally unveil it on the world (and a little nervous, honestly). Among some of the top secret stuff I was doing in LA, I managed to squeeze in a photo shoot with the beautiful Gina Elise from Pin-Ups for Vets. You can look forward to seeing yours truly in the 2016 calendar.

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