Terminal Lance #127 “Incentives”

May 27, 2011

There’s no doubt in my mind that in the modern-day Marine Corps there’s no way in broomstick-fucking hell anyone would try to get a Lance Corporal to re-enlist so intently. This, however, was not the case when I was active duty. There was a point in time–around 2008 or 2009–when the Marine Corps was offering $90,000 in cold, hard, dick-twitching cash money to re-enlist if you served as a squad leader in combat. 90-fucking-grand. Needless to say, many Marines found that to be a fruitful incentive.

Abe, on the other hand, isn’t so interested in re-enlisting. Abe, much like myself, always wondered what kind of ridiculous shit you could get away with when it came to re-enlistment incentives. The ridiculous shit you could throw at them would be an endless source of entertainment–one that I missed out on due to the fact that no one wanted an 0351 Lance Coolie to re-enlist in mid 2010. Regardless, I wouldn’t have, but it would’ve at least been a fun opportunity for myself.

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