By 
Deep in the recesses of the San Onofre coastline in California lies the dastardly Green Weenie Research Facility. It is there that the Marine Corps’ top evil scientists work on new and inventive ways to make the lives of Marines miserable.
Green Weenie Research Facility, Camp Pendleton
The “Squad Push-Up” was a product of years of illegal experiments on Marines, culminating in the obscene workout in which you stick your face up the butthole of your friends and pushup together. As one.
A… Human centipede, of sorts.
Enlist today pic.twitter.com/9OOGSriJUL
— Terminal Lance (@TerminalLance) November 11, 2021
Stay vigilant, Marines. The evil of the Green Weenie doesn’t rest.
INCONCEIV…… wait.
That looks like the boobie gas storage in Los Santos. They must be orb’d immediately.
That can’t be a thing! It is absurd!
In the Army we just arrayed in a square with feet on shoulders, ya’ll got some weirdness going on in the Marines.
I am so glad nobody in 2D MLG ever did any of this crap.
This is why I joined the Air Force (takes cover for the impending retaliation, if it makes you feel any better, I was flightline maintenance: the grunts of the USAF)
I was an infantryman in the Army and we did what we called Ranger Push-ups. The idea is similar in concept, but instead of burying your face in your buddyβs ass, you put your ankles on his shoulders, while another buddy of yours puts his ankles on your shoulders. Typically done as a fireteam of four, it basically forms a square and you push up and down as one.
Thatβs that decommissioned nuke plant on Pendletonβs coastline isnβt it?
Fun fact, they once showed us a slide of βexpected falloutβ should that plant have blown up all Chernobyl style and the estimated lethal range was just barely contained by the base.