Skating is a fine art… And it’s one that probably not everyone should practice at the same time. For each lame event that you can maybe weasel out of attending, there’s maybe only enough room for 2 or 3 Marines to be missing from a platoon sized element. Any more than that and it starts to become obvious. Masterful skating is best kept in the shadows by a select few talented individuals.
For those of you reading this and wondering why anyone would want to skip such riveting powerpoint presentations done at the 4th grade reading level, know that most of the check-in-the-box annual training is something that no one actually cares about. Marines aren’t likely to gain much extra worldly perspective from watching a bored Sergeant deliver a misspelled PowerPoint presentation while surrounded by the smell of farts and dip spit, but we do it anyway.
Well, the boots do it and the seniors have them cover for them.
There’s a weird loyalty involved with covering for your seniors. You know they’re total assholes to you, but for some reason you love them anyway. I suppose that’s what people mean when they talk about that coveted USMC brotherhood. At the very least, it rolls off the tongue better than signing in your douchebag seniors because they told you to and you don’t want to get hazed tomorrow.