Maximilian

Creator


Terminal Lance “Call me Maybe: Infantry Version”

July 24, 2012

I’m sure most of you by now have seen the POGilicious rendition of “Call me Maybe” that’s been floating around the YouTubes lately. If not, feel free to take a look at it here:

If there’s one thing I can promise you about this video, it’s that every grunt in the Marine Corps rolled their eyes and probably turned it off when they got about… here:

Hooah

Or here:

On some level, I feel bad shitting on this video because I completely understand that Marines and soldiers of all MOS’ need to relax and do something fun while overseas to keep their mind off of being away from their families and such. But that doesn’t change the fact that the video is lame, moto, and POG as fuck. If these two shots didn’t seal the deal for you, the “OORAH” at the end of the video will probably make you want to suck-start your dust-covered M4.

It doesn’t take a trained eye to see that there’s not a single grunt in this video. This much should be obvious anyway, since it was shot at Kandahar, I’m assuming a few hundred meters away from the Green Bean World Cafe. While clearly you’d have to go to a real FOB to catch some grunts, they’d probably avoid doing something so completely lame anyway and instead opt to make videos of eachother lighting their pubes on fire or peeing on Taliban fighters–both of which would probably be more entertaining and less cringe-worthy.

No one cares about wasted time or tax dollars putting this show on. Grunts hate seeing things like this because it harkens a facade of badassery in a place where none exists. While the grunts are out on the FOBs living in squalor, sleeping in shit, eating Otis Spunkmeyer muffins and trying not to die every day, the boys (and girls) back at Kandahar are posing with their oh-so-clean rifles for a fun time.

So hey, keep having fun, just don’t expect the infantry to give a shit.

In other news, I’m sure you all noticed that I hadn’t updated the site in the last couple weeks. Of course, this is because I was on vacation, which I mentioned in the last comic, but that didn’t stop me from getting a plethora of wonderful messages like this:

My fans are so nice

While I was in Oregon I got to visit my family, went fishing in Newport with my dad and even went to a wedding. It was a good time, but one thing I hate about going home is that I always feel so stressed out. I’m always running back and forth between an 82 mile span of valley between Portland and Corvallis, I put over 2000 miles on my car during this trip. It’s been like this ever since I enlisted though, once I left for the Corps I never really intended to move back to Oregon; so when I do get the chance to visit I am the one that no one ever sees anymore.

I was also in Hollywood yesterday, but that wasn’t a vacation, that was business. I’m not going to mention much right now, but I’ll just say I spent yesterday meeting a variety of really great people that I look forward to working with!