Maximilian

Creator


Terminal Lance “Hashtag WWIII”

January 3, 2020

I can only imagine the surprise that Marines are arriving back to in their drunken and hungover stupors after the holiday leave block, as we kick off the New Year with quite a bang by assassinating a high level Iranian general in Baghdad. 2/7 Marines are already on the scene at the US embassy, many of them probably with alcohol and eggnog still on their breath as they drunkenly meander into the fray.

Hopefully there’s at least one Marine with some buzzers to administer much needed barracks cuts to those nasty scalps.

There’s been a lot of rampant Twitter speculation about this being the beginning of World War III, complete with its own hashtag and all. I won’t comment on the geopolitical dealings of such a surprising maneuver. I only hope that the Marines and soldiers being sent in are ready and willing for whatever happens next.

I’m sure they are.

I have a variety of emotions about the return to Iraq. Having been there myself on two deployments, years ago, it’s not something I was necessarily expecting. But, given the nature and history of these never-ending wars… perhaps I should have.

As a very unrelated aside, WE HAVE A CONTEST GOING ON! Check out the post below and submit your DUTY DOODLES to social@terminallance.com before the end of tomorrow (Saturday, January 4th, 2020)… We have some special stuff in store for the winners.

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TERMINAL LANCE DUTY DOODLE CONTEST: You have until the end of January 4th (11:59pm PST) to draw and doodle something fit for a portashitter wall! Draw anything! The only limit is your imagination, but try to imagine you’re bored on duty or stuck in a portashitter while drawing it. Email your high resolution drawing to social@terminallance.com with the subject “DICK DRAWING” or slide into our DM’s to submit a duty doodle. The best drawings will be featured on Terminal Lance and the winners will receive a free shirt. ORIGINAL ARTWORK ONLY. Please try to scan or get a high quality picture of your work, higher resolution the better! Happy doodling. #terminallance #usmc #marines #marinecorps #military

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Maximilian

Creator

Terminal Lance #566 “The Holiday Leave Travelers”

December 20, 2019

Christmas approaches and the Marines are leading a full-scale invasion of America’s airports nationwide. At every international and regional hub in the states, you’ll find a smorgasbord of different Marine archetypes traveling home for their holiday leave block. Unleashed upon the world, Marines and other service members fill the airports with their haircuts, tactical backpacks, and maybe even a uniform or two.

The holiday leave block, graciously granted by your command (at the last minute), is a time of calm and reflection with your family. For most, it will also be a time to ignore text messages from your overbearing command and binge drink with your burnout friends that never left home (but always have a case of Natty Light ready for you).

For the Marines of 3/6, it will be a time of anger and resentment and declining reenlistment numbers.

Personally, I’ve been each one of these airport character classes at one point or another. I actually did wear my service alphas home from Hawaii to Portland, once, to impress my mom.

Delta Airlines couldn’t have given less of a shit, and my ass sat in the cheap seat I paid for for the six hour duration of the flight over the Pacific.

Travel safe, Marines.

Maximilian

Creator

Terminal Lance #565 “Left Behind II”

December 13, 2019

Sometimes good ideas backfire tremendously. Staying back from leave is a double-edged sword. On one hand, you get to save up leave days and avoid seeing family you don’t actually like. On the other, you’re the only line of defense between the Marine Corps barracks and the wilderness surrounding it, meaning you will likely have a lot more duty than you would have otherwise. After all, if there’s not a Marine on duty, do the barracks even exist? Do they revert back to nature?

Is this what the barracks will look like with no Marine on duty?

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This is why you can never bring a date back to the barracks… no privacy. #terminallance #usmc #marines #marinecorps #military

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It may be worth it at the end, however, when you’re soaking up the sun, growing out your beard, and collecting those last few trickling paychecks on your terminal leave block. Put those leave days to work and save them up for that sweet, sweet DD-214 vacation.

Maximilian

Creator

Terminal Lance #454 “Double Life”

January 24, 2017

If you believed the illusion of going home on leave, you’d think being a Marine is a glorious task gifted from the gods. You come home for the first time in that new uniform, with a tight haircut and a fresh shave with a splash of Cobra 65 and you’d think you actually were some kind of a hero. Little does your family and high school sweetheart know, you haven’t really done much of anything besides pass the fuck out on the Reaper hike and get a thermometer shoved up your asshole by an eager Corpsman.

Still, we all keep the myth alive. Don’t get me wrong, you do occasionally do some pretty neat shit. I’ve fired all kinds of rockets and machine-guns, and I’ve flown on helicopters across the vast deserts of the middle east in enemy territory. But this generally remains about 1% of the job. For some, that 1% is enough to make up for the 99% of mundanity and general all-around awfulness.

For the others, there’s always the Post 9/11 GI Bill.

On a side note, don’t freak out about the color, I’m just messing around with it. Well, there’s a lot more color content coming soon, but I can’t talk about it yet… If you follow TL on Instagram, you’ll probably come across some of the work in progress over here posted to the story. Stay tuned for more TL!

Maximilian

Creator

Terminal Lance #447 “Leave Blocked II”

December 6, 2016

Marines accrue 2.5 days of paid leave per month, to a grand total of 120 days of leave for a regular 4 year enlistment. Generally speaking, at least for an infantry company, you can only use those leave days during allowed “leave blocks.” This leads to a natural deluge of requests at around the same time, with everyone waiting anxiously for them to be marked “Approved” on MOL. Of course, the only thing standing in the way of your leave being approved is your chain of command, who always seem to want to make the process as painful as possible.

This becomes tremendously arduous when you’re somewhere like Marine Corps Base Hawaii and have to fly a minimum of 5 hours to get home to anywhere on the mainland. Plane tickets are expensive, and they only get more expensive the longer you wait.

But First Sergeant doesn’t care.

First Sergeant doesn’t give a fuck.

First Sergeant has his entire family on the island and he’s not going anywhere. First Sergeant feeds on the misery of his Marines, it is his lifeblood. He drinks the tears of Lance Corporals as coffee every morning.

Hey, worst case scenario, just spend Christmas in the barracks and save that leave for sweet, sweet Terminal.

In other news, I’m making a conscious effort to get Terminal Lance a little more grounded, back into the menial and every day. I often feel pressured to make every comic strip some grand, sweeping insight over life, rather than just making a funny joke about the every day suck. I suppose that just comes naturally to most creative products, but Terminal Lance is a comic for the Marines by a Marine, and it needs to stay that way.

Stay tuned for more.