Terminal Lance “Florence and the Marines”

September 18, 2018

I’m a little late with this, but in case you missed it, Camp Lejeune was hit by the devastating Hurricane Florence over the weekend, which cause some significant damage and equally significant barracks partying. Prior to the hurricane making landfall, the world was abuzz in disbelief that the base commander had ordered the Marines to remain in place while the hurricane battered the east coast.

How could they force the Marines to stay there?! EVERYONE WILL DIE!

Well, you’d think so at least, with the way people were freaking out about it. The deluge of hilarious videos and photos I got during and after the weather event made me start to think that the base commander was on to something… Maybe they didn’t let the Marines evacuate, because they simply knew the Marines would have so much fun if they stay.

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Weather man: there’s a category 4 hurricane coming, evacuate now. Marines:

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In all seriousness, the hurricane is no laughing matter. Practically the entire state was flooded and it is in fact a state of emergency. Being on the west coast, hurricanes aren’t something I’m super familiar with, but they seem like they suck. Of course my thoughts and prayers are with the people of the east coast as they recover from the disaster.

In another somber note, I want to mention the loss of a Marine that was in my platoon back in India Company 3/3, Weapons Platoon. Rest in peace Kasey Ozzello, or as I knew him, Ozz. He was an 0341 Mortarman back in the day and we are all sad to see him go. I was never personally super close to him, but I know his loss is affecting everyone that knew him, he was a great guy.

On a less somber note, I want to mention that I will be in San Diego on a panel hosted by the New York Times on October 4th. Please check out the event site here for tickets and the details! I’ll be joined by Pulitzer Prize winning author CJ Chivers, filmmaker Jason Hall, and Marine and author Dave Morris. It should be a good time!



Terminal Lance “Memorial Day 2018”

May 25, 2018

The rules of the Marines standing post in heaven have always been unclear to me. Like, is that all Marines throughout all of American history? Only the grunts? Do the older generations of Marines get issued new gear to keep them up to date with the current load outs? Is there like a 4 year contract in heaven? So it’s like 4 years active duty/4 years IRR/4 years heaven? What are the Marines actually guarding against? Demons? I thought heaven was supposed to be perfect.

I feel like the Commandant of the Marine Corps really needs to come out and clarify this stuff, because right now none of it makes sense.

In any case, this weekend is Memorial Day weekend. With that will come the plethora of social media posts either…

A) Guilt-tripping you with some random sad ass photos of dead Marines or something just in case you forgot what Memorial Day was about.

B) Super woke dudes that guilt-trip the guilt-tripping dudes by posting the same thing ironically

C) Advertising really insane deals on a new mattress

In any case, I know you guys have a 96 or at least a 72 this weekend, so please refer to last week’s comic and blog post for your safety brief.

Wishing you a great Memorial Day, whoever you are.