Terminal Lance “Masked Up”

February 20, 2021

If there’s at least one upside to having to wear masks in the midst of the COVID pandemic, it’s that Marines can now safely grow out those thigh-ticklers in peace. When any Lance Corporal is given an inch, you can be guaranteed they will take it as many miles as they can. There’s nothing particularly fascinating or attractive about beards, but Lance Corporals make their money on small acts of rebellion, clinging to what slivers of identity they have left.

At this point I haven’t figured out if Marine veterans grow beards out of desire or out of spite for having not been allowed to grow it out for (at least) 4 years.

Can you believe the first comic strip I did about COVID was nearly an entire year ago? What a strange time we live in.



Terminal Lance “Clinically Trialed”

February 5, 2021

This is a joke, but it would surprise no one. With such little control over your own life while enlisted in the service of Uncle Sam, it should come as no surprise that you have equally no say over what vaccines you are given as well. You haven’t lived until you’ve stood in line with 150 other Marines to get a delicious cocktail of medically administered flu, anthrax, and smallpox vaccines all at once.

My entire battalion flew across the globe with swollen, disgusting scabs on our arms from the scar-inducing smallpox vaccine.

Of course, with the current state of affairs, Marines should be so lucky to be getting inoculated against COVID. Marines need to be kept healthy and ready; if not to fight our nation’s wars, then to at least keep Doc from dying of boredom.

(Funny how that strip from 11 months ago has aged. Like most, I really thought the pandemic would be over and done with by now, rather than a continued discussion almost an entire year later)



Terminal Lance “Happy Thanksgiving 2020”

November 25, 2020

It’s a weird time for everyone. To be honest, I thought this whole COVID pandemic was going to be over and done for within a few months. Here we are, 9 months later, unable to celebrate Thanksgiving with our loved ones and forced to eat chow hall for our biggest national food holiday.

For you Marines stuck in the barracks this year, I bless upon thee that you acquire a coveted PlayStation 5 and can spend your time playing Demon’s Souls instead of pretending to want to hang out with your ugly cousin.

Blessings upon thee.

Happy Thanksgiving, Marines… Or at least as much of a Thanksgiving as you can get.