Terminal Lance “Budgetary Dietary”

October 3, 2020

Over the last 20 years we’ve been in a weird place in terms of our military budget. With the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, they were able to convince the American people that we needed to be spending half a trillion dollars annually on the Department of Defense, but then the wars died down (a lot) and now we’re still spending record amounts of money on the military.

All well and good if the money is going to troop welfare and making their lives a little less shitty… Except it never does. Chow halls across the Corps are notorious for their subpar prison meals, which Marines actually pay for out of their monthly BAS allotment (and can be requested back if they don’t wish to partake in such dining delicacies, but then you have to pay for the chow hall with cash, which is super awkward).

While we may never know where all that money is going, we can rest assured that it’s certainly not going to the food.



Terminal Lance #539 “Chow Hall Nightmares”

March 15, 2019

There’s terrible things going on in chow halls across the Marine Corps. Well, I don’t actually know this, I’m just assuming so because the food is often so bad that it must mean something has gone terribly wrong. Of course, bad food and the military go together like moldy peas and carrots. Hell, the DOD spends $22 million a year on lobster tails and the food still sucks.

Not even Gordon Ramsay himself could save the hell that is a Marine Corps chow hall.

I’ve heard horrific rumors of Marines coming across boxes of meat and produce that state things like “FOR MILITARY AND PRISON CONSUMPTION ONLY,” which I believe simply on the basis of the food being so generally awful. There’s only so much even the most talented, bored, gold-ranked chow hall Lance Corporal can do with with what he’s given.

Still, I have to give credit where it’s due, weekend breakfast at the chow hall is among the best in the business. I’d pay top dollar for one of those glorious Sunday morning omelets in the civilian world.