Maximilian

Creator

Terminal Lance #125 “Barracks Cuts”

May 17, 2011

While I am a proponent of the idea that haircuts costs too damn much money, I am also supportive of the idea that Marines should get them professionally done at all times. Unless you plan on shaving your head, odds are your roommate isn’t going to do a very good job with the clippers he bought at the PX the night before. I know, “We’ll save so much money!” is what you thought–but really, you end up paying for it when Staff Sergeant sees your shabby head and forces you to unfuck yourself during your lunch break.

The fact is, most Marines are not trained barbers. Hell, most barbers on base are not trained barbers, but they’ve been doing it long enough to get a fade right. Barracks cuts inevitably lead to messed up fades, buzzing your head–and worst of all–itchy shirts.

For those of you not in the know, the “line” Abe is referring to here in today’s comic is the fade line that all Marines are concerned with after getting a haircut. The line can be too hard, it can be too soft, it can be crooked, it can be jagged, misshapen and everything else. The line is the most important part of a Marine’s weekly hair treatment. The line says everything about that Marine’s haircut and further about that Marine’s personality. The higher the line, the more motivated a Marine is likely to be–the lower the line, the opposite holds true.

Back on the subject of barracks cuts though; the worst possible outcome for a shot attempt at a haircut? Having to get a high and tight to make up for it.

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